Manthropology: Sex With A Do-Me Queen

What’s making his bulge so big: It’s all him, and he’s not afraid to show it off.

What’s in his pockets: A magnum condom, sunglasses for the morning after walk of shame, cock ring, and a pocket toothbrush.

What’s in his wallet: Membership card to a sex club, membership card to an after-hours club, gym membership card, business card from a taxi service, prescription for Kwell lotion and a phone number or address of his last trick.

What’s he driving: Any kind of 4-Wheeler, usually a Jeep

What’s on his coffee table: Empty cigarette packs, match books from various clubs, empty condom wrappers (they never made it to the bedroom), and a bar napkin with some guy’s name on it.

Family tree: Silent Stud, One-Night Wonder, Circuit Queen, Body Natzis, Brian Kinney (QAF).

The Do-Me Queen (DMQ) will have both a great body and a large personal unit. Armed as such, the DMQ is truly and totally conceited (at least in bed), and as long as gay men worship large units, he will get away with it.Nonetheless, adding one to your list of bedmates is something you should do once. You may never want it again, but at least you can say you’ve been there, and done that.

Like Starbucks, DMQ’s can be found on just about any corner in gay civilization, and you can be sure he will be showing off his goods. He’s the one with the skimpiest shorts at the gym, the one standing right under the brightest spotlight at the bar, the guy that made stock in spandex a great investment. Once you’ve found him, picking him up shouldn’t be too hard since the DMQ is usually quite eager to let everyone know what size shoe he wears. The only hard part will be fighting off all of the other size queens circling him like sharks. Any opening will do to catch his attention, I recommend the direct approach.

Your place or his is fine. Since he normally scores a lot, his bedroom will be well-appointed with any high quality sexnology paraphernalia you may need. Once you get him into bed, the DMQ will do what he does best: lie down on his back and cross his arms behind his head. This not only makes his upper pecs, bis, traps and abs ripple to perfection, but also makes it clear that he will not be doing much to make your toes tingle. You knew this going in, so get over it.

Your encounter with the DMQ will be all about the visuals, so feast your eyes while you can; it’s also a good chance for you to practice your best oral action on a larger unit. The DMQ will probably want to go on to full sex with you, and he’ll be really good at it, since he’s been around the block a few times. Just don’t be offended if he spends more time watching himself instead of looking deeply into your eyes.

Once the deed is done, grab a quick shower to freshen up, then clear out. You’ll probably pass someone else on the way up as you head down the stairs.

Hot, sweaty sex potential: (Even thought it’s all about him, the full-sex part may amp up the sweat factor.)

Getting some real estate out of the deal potential:
(ZERO)

Long-term relationship potential:

Good stories to tell your friends over brunch potential:

Possible bonus points: Steal his extra large cock ring as a trophy.